Evidence and Control vs. Faith

So, we got a good report on my little girl when we went to the Pediatric Orthopedist. A really good, thorough (2 hours in the office) report. So good in fact the Doctor said there is not a real reason to be concerned about anything life threatening. My husband and I were happy but yet concerned. Was this doctor missing something? We were almost disappointed. After an hour into the appointment the doctor stepped out and I mentioned to my husband that we really shouldn't be surprised by this, or concerned. After all, we had been praying over her for healing and our church had been praying over her for healing. So, why weren't we celebrating? Well you see, we are human. At least I am. I wanted, on paper, a diagnosis (hello evidence) and then I wanted to be able to attack it (hello control) with medications and treatments. Then I would know that she was being taken care of...that's what all good moms want, right. I think if you are honest with yourself here you have to agree. If your child is sick, you want to know what it is so you can take care of it. BUT, when we take our children to God and ask for healing - we don't get the diagnosis and PRAISE GOD there is not treatment required. It is finished. That is where FAITH comes in. I have known for years now not to put my trust and assurance in MAN, no matter how much education, training or accolades he has. I fell into a trap - of course the trap was set by Satan. I fell into trusting the world tell me what was wrong. I have spent months praying and knowing that God could heal her but wondering would he heal her. Months in fear and worry. I would be dishonest to tell you that I don't have a concern in the world now regarding her health. But my worries are far less than what they have been. I have really had to force myself to to believe God is or has healed her. He promises it, He is greater than whatever this was, He loves me, He loves her far much more than I ever could or imagine.

I wanted the evidence and the control of the situation. It would give me peace of mind. Ultimate peace does not come from our own abilities. Ultimate peace is found at the throne of God. I go to the throne often...each time I lay a bit of my control down and pick up a piece of His peace. Eventually I will have more of His peace than I have of my control. I look forward to that day.

I am still looking forward to what is hopefully the last set of test results. I am looking forward to whatever they have to say because regardless of what they say, ultimately the healing power of God is touching her. God always finishes his work...so she will be healed if she isn't already.

I hope I have expressed this well. I think many of us fall into this trap. I hope I am putting up a marker to help you avoid it.

Lots of love to all,

D. J.