Wow! Change is Good.

I am sure I won't be able to adequately express my thoughts and experiences today. It's just amazing. God has been really working on growing me. I want to note that God can't grow you if you don't open yourself up to the growth. Anyway, growth requires change. For me they have been some pretty BIG changes personally. Not anything anyone would necessarily notice on the outside. But still BIG for me. The main thing is choosing not to stress in a certain area of my life. This was hard, I guess it still is. I would stress about this one particular thing and then I would get in a mood and then I would complain about the person or people that I was stressing over. A very bad chain. Ephesians 4:29 says let no unwholesome talk come our of your mouth. So you know, complaining would fall under the unwholesome category. Stress ROBS you of peace, of memories, of good times. So, obediently I have been choosing to stress less. The blessings are wonderful that have followed. Many times we are so caught up and puffed up about the changes God is calling us to that we just focus on the change and the discomfort. When we do that we miss the blessings he is giving us as a reward for our obedience. The changes God calls us to always lead to a better way, a better place, a better life. We forget that when we realize we have to change.

Last night I fell back. I allowed myself to stress a bit. Satan prodded a bit through other people, and I had a chance to stand up and say something positive, something uplifting, something that would glorify God. I didn't. I joined in and complained. At the time I knew I was not behaving in a way God would have me to...but I did it anyway. There is almost a comfort sometimes in knowing that something that stresses us also stresses someone else. It's like justifying our stress. That's called PRIDE. That is a trap set by SATAN.

It's bothering me today. I am asking for forgiveness as I type this. I liked basking in the blessing of the change much better than having to sit in the mire of my pride and disobedience. This lesson has really been driven home for me.

This is just a small area of change I am going through. I am amazed and in awe of all God can work on at one time if we just open ourselves up to it. I am seeing more changes ahead but I am also aware that there is a new calling for me ahead. I see lots of pieces to it right now but am not sure what it will come to once it all comes together. But I am excited!

Lots of love to all!

D. J.

Evidence and Control vs. Faith

So, we got a good report on my little girl when we went to the Pediatric Orthopedist. A really good, thorough (2 hours in the office) report. So good in fact the Doctor said there is not a real reason to be concerned about anything life threatening. My husband and I were happy but yet concerned. Was this doctor missing something? We were almost disappointed. After an hour into the appointment the doctor stepped out and I mentioned to my husband that we really shouldn't be surprised by this, or concerned. After all, we had been praying over her for healing and our church had been praying over her for healing. So, why weren't we celebrating? Well you see, we are human. At least I am. I wanted, on paper, a diagnosis (hello evidence) and then I wanted to be able to attack it (hello control) with medications and treatments. Then I would know that she was being taken care of...that's what all good moms want, right. I think if you are honest with yourself here you have to agree. If your child is sick, you want to know what it is so you can take care of it. BUT, when we take our children to God and ask for healing - we don't get the diagnosis and PRAISE GOD there is not treatment required. It is finished. That is where FAITH comes in. I have known for years now not to put my trust and assurance in MAN, no matter how much education, training or accolades he has. I fell into a trap - of course the trap was set by Satan. I fell into trusting the world tell me what was wrong. I have spent months praying and knowing that God could heal her but wondering would he heal her. Months in fear and worry. I would be dishonest to tell you that I don't have a concern in the world now regarding her health. But my worries are far less than what they have been. I have really had to force myself to to believe God is or has healed her. He promises it, He is greater than whatever this was, He loves me, He loves her far much more than I ever could or imagine.

I wanted the evidence and the control of the situation. It would give me peace of mind. Ultimate peace does not come from our own abilities. Ultimate peace is found at the throne of God. I go to the throne often...each time I lay a bit of my control down and pick up a piece of His peace. Eventually I will have more of His peace than I have of my control. I look forward to that day.

I am still looking forward to what is hopefully the last set of test results. I am looking forward to whatever they have to say because regardless of what they say, ultimately the healing power of God is touching her. God always finishes his work...so she will be healed if she isn't already.

I hope I have expressed this well. I think many of us fall into this trap. I hope I am putting up a marker to help you avoid it.

Lots of love to all,

D. J.

Not a lot of new - more of the same

God is still pruning away. The understanding of the benefit of pruning is becoming more concrete and accepting for me. Great devotions, great teachings and preaching all that line up with where I am with God. Coincidence? I don't think so. Confirmation from God? You bet!

This week I am very aware of how much my cup runneth over. I am so so so blessed. My God is good and my God is so able. I have had a couple of bumps this week...can't lie, they have me a little concerned, but I can see past them this week. I haven't been able to see beyond the negative much lately, so I am encouraged.

I don't know if this will make much sense, but I am remembering how to pray, I am remembering how to read the word, I am remembering to give God Glory and lift Him up in may day to day dealings. I am remembering what I am to live for.

It's all good!

D. J.