One of the hardest things as a parent...

Last night and today my heart has been heavy for my 16 year old daughter. In our house you are simply not allowed to disrespect or flip attitude to an adult...period. I believe wholeheartedly that we must always keep a cap on our emotions, keep our character and dignity in check, no matter the situation. I wish I could say that I am quite perfect at doing this, but not always. It took me a long while to realize that even if I was being wronged or if my integrity was being compromised based on untrue statement that I simply do not have the right to respond negatively. It is my responsibility as a Christian to be the bigger person and the better person. You would think all adults get this and try to act appropriately, right? Not so. I received a phone call from an adult saying my daughter had shown some disrespect and the way it was explained I had no doubt that she did. I also had the knowledge that this adult was not willing to see that they may actually have some fault in the situation and in turn made my daughter looks as if she were in the wrong about a situation. As hard as it was, I contacted my daughter at school, and had to tell her that she had to go apologize for the disrespect. I tried to explain that she was not accepting fault for the situation at hand, that she was only taking responsibility in handling herself incorrectly when confronted. Fortunately she did take responsibility for the attitude and disrespect and she went to apologize. The adult responded very smugly and did some other not so adult things as well. This is indeed one of the hardest things to do as a parent. 1) I want to teach her to always maintain her character and dignity. One of the quotes she loves regarding her purity is "I can be like them in a second, but now they can never be like me" I had to use this with her explaining that anybody can be rude, smug, dishonest and/or negative, but NOT everyone can handle themselves with character and dignity. 2) I wanted to go and totally act without dignity and character to defend my daughter! Talk about praying over this. I went on to explain that today she needed to be sure that she approached this adult with a hello and kind words and a kind attitude just as she has done most days for a while now.

In the midst of all this I also learned a very sad thing. I am AWFUL about reacting with anger when my feelings are hurt. I realized a few years ago it is much easier for me to be angry than it is for me to feel hurt. My daughter cried last night because another adult involved believed the wrong/bad thing that was said about her. The root of all of the issue was that someone she trusted, respected and truly adores didn't give her the benefit of the doubt, didn't say, "that doesn't sound like her" Did I pass this on to her - to get mad instead of accepting that people are going to hurt your feelings sometimes.

Then I also had to explain to her that regardless of whether or not these two adults every asked for forgiveness that she needed to forgive them now and not let the bitterness of unforgiveness take root in her. So hard.

These were such huge lessons, adult sized lessons for her to face and learn at such a young age. I had to learn this all on my own as an adult so from that perspective I am glad she is learning young as it will make her such a better adult.

I have been challenged by this to be sure I live in the ways that I have explained to her are right and Christlike.

Don't fight your children's battles for them, teach them how to do battle themselves using the Word and instruction of God.

Okay, that's my blog for this week!

D. J.

Imaging

I am still on my Norman Vincent Peale reading kick. I have just about finished reading the Power of Positive Imagining. Last night as I prayed I was imaging the people I was praying for receiving what I was requesting for them. Somehow it comforted me to see the picture of God answering my prayers as I was praying for them. I know He is always working on them, but the human part of us wants to see it, by imaging it I get to see it. I prayed about something last night and my husband brought up the need this morning - my first response was tension in my body - but I very quickly released it when I imaged what I imaged last night and put my trust back in God. It's a very neat principle. It's like taking your faith to a higher step. We are undergoing some significant changes right now and really stepping out in faith in a couple of areas. Being able to image the concerns as non concerns as answered prayers keeps me focused on trusting God. Truly trusting God. I dare you to try it! I also dare you to get one of his books and read it! Until next week! D. J.

Here's a thought - Faith and Pride

A week ago Sunday I was doing a 9 mile walk/jog in preparation for my first half marathon on May 1st. About 1/2 way through my knee began to hurt. Oddly enough, it hurt more when I walked. I was not sure I was going to be able to finish my training for the day. I kept pushing on. About 7 miles into it I decided to text my husband because I really did not know if I was going to make it. He encouraged me but was willing to come and get me if I needed him to. I completed my training. I immediately sat down and put ice on my knee. The next day, it was still pretty tender. I ran 2.5 miles Tuesday night, I can run pain free but walking really hurts. Wednesday - tender. Thursday I run another 2.5 no problem, except when I walk. Friday I think it's getting better. Run Saturday in a 5k race, new personal best time! Saturday night the knee starts popping when I walk, Sunday the pain is worse. Sunday at church I wanted to go forward and ask for prayer for healing, but I held back. I didn't ask because I thought my request was rather selfish. First of all, I didn't want to go to the doctor. I didn't want to tell the doctor that I am a runner and training for a half marathon because I am still a big girl - I didn't want to be embarrassed. I also did not want him to tell me I could not or should not do the half marathon. Second, I want my knee healed so I can do the half marathon. I know God can and will heal but didn't think my motives were right. So I began contemplating on this. God WANTS to heal me...He doesn't want me to be in pain...but does He care about my half marathon. Sunday it got a bit worse and by Monday morning it was popping with almost every walking step I took and when it popped it shot a pain through my knee. I called the doctor. I admitted I was a runner at my size and that I was training for a half marathon. Amazingly - it didn't knock him off his doctor stool! He just looked at my knee, asked me some more questions, and then prescribed some meds and a follow up visit before the race and said if we needed to we could put a shot into my knee to help at that time. WOW! Yesterday I started the medicine, put a knee support on for the day, I did not go run (because I didn't feel good) and my friend prayed for God to heal me knee and I agreed with her in this prayer. TODAY - minimal pops, minimal pain. You be the judge - one day of medicine and a knee support or GOD. I am leaning towards God. Something in my spirit said to me - D. J. not wanting to go to the doctor for those reasons are issues of pride, you faced those issues which opened the door for God to heal. I think it's pretty darn neat! Thank you God for healing my knee! Til next week. D. J.

Practice how you will Play

I played basketball when I was in high school. To this day I love basketball. My dad instilled in me a discipline that I practice today and that I have handed down to my children. As a freshman I moved to a new school and of course I wanted to play basketball! But none of the coaches at this new school had seen me play before and tryouts were a week long process. I was scared that I would not make the team since the coaches had never seen me play previous to try outs. My dad wisely instructed me to practice/tryout as if I were in the actual game - playing. "Practice how you plan to play" meaning go out there and practice as if your team depends on your performance for the win! Give it 110%! I can honestly say I had the most energy and hustle of any girl that tried out that week and YES I made the team - Jr. Varsity since I was a freshman but I got to sit on the bench as an extra/just in case for Varsity! Practice how you plan to play. Today as I train for a half marathon - I want to stop and rest while I am training, but I don't plan to stop and rest when I actually do the official half marathon so why would I practice that way! Today this principle is just as valid as it was over 20 years ago in my life. Last week I blogged about Norman Vincent Peale and I have been practicing more positive thoughts, living and imaging. On Sunday my husband came home with some pretty scary financial news. The kind that your mind instantly goes to worse case scenario type scary! I will admit at first I feared and was in a bit of a panic. But I had been practicing positive thoughts, living and imaging so now it was time to play! Remember all these thoughts, living and imaging are hand in hand with Gods word and require belief in God and His word - good old fashioned FAITH. Let me tell you I felt calmer very quickly and by Monday afternoon God was showing that he was in charge of our finances - and that we needed to FEAR NOT in a big way! As Christians every single day we have to live our faith - most days its pretty easy, but if we don't pay attention and purposefully live it on those easy days - come true game time we won't be prepared! Practice how you plan to Play! D. J.

Positive Positive Positive

This will just be a short one today. I am on my Norman Vincent Peale reading kick again! Man he was sure wise! I am rereading The Power of Positive Imaging and recently finished The Power of Positive Thinking and The Power of Positive Living. These 3 books really cover every area of our walk with Christ! How we think, how we live, and how we see ourselves as God sees us and as how God created us. I became aware of some thinkings that could be potentially harmful, I became aware of how my positive attitude has fallen back over the years since I first read these books. Everything he discusses is really biblical! I love this! I highly recommend you read anything he has written! These are the only 3 books of his that I own. I think I am going to either purchase more or head to the library to check out some!

That's my tidbit for today!

D. J.

What's up with chaos?

Have you ever noticed how we are just bombarded by chaotic unpredictable events and everything, even the mundane stuff, we had a grip on just grabs on to the proverbial rolling stone and goes down at an alarming rate! It is amazing when we can finish one simple task, like cooking dinner, or getting the bed made. Sometimes as it just begins to hit, we brace ourselves, knowing if we keep our cool and stand strong that we will weather the storm and it will soon be over. But then, another storm comes and we haven't quite recouped from the last one. Well, that's where I am at. It's not necessarily a bad place, but not a place I enjoy either. I get frustrated with myself for not being able to stay on top of things better in spite of the chaotic unpredictable madness. As I type this though, I wonder, is it really that I have been bombarded or am I always bombarded I just haven't been handling the normal bombardment well this go around. I don't know.

I think it started when I fell in the snow and hurt my wrist. I am getting good use back now and think I will even try doing dishes tonight. This happened 3 or 4 weeks ago. Then Brandy broke her finger about a week later ~ which led to frustrating interactions with doctors ~ which led to making calls to the Shriners. There is still a lot of activity in the broken finger storm going on. Add a case of strep throat for Brandy ~ diagnosed on Monday. Add a federal report at work that was due Friday ~ couldn't complete because I had put it off too long, had to leave early Friday to take Brandy to PT, and had to request information from another department for the report and it had not been returned yet. Planned on completing Monday but stayed home with Brandy due to the Strep. Tuesday had to play catch up before I could touch the report. Report is done today! So I think the brunt of the storm is over, but now it's time to clean up and to not let anything else get messy or behind. Have you ever had so much that needed to be done "Right Now" that it was just easier to do "Nothing". It's just too overwhelming to even try to figure out where to begin? Yep ~ that's where I am. I know I am a good planner/organizer/prioritizer. But at this point, I have no confidence in my abilities...well no confidence in all but one ability. My ability to pray.

To some it may seem silly to pray about getting caught up, about staying on top of what you do get done, about getting a plan of attack ready, and to pray for help just getting started. BUT, I am hear to tell you God is eager to jump in and help in any capacity we need him to. He is eager for that interaction with us. He is eager for us to reach out, for us to include Him. He is eager to pour out blessings of calm, of focus, of hope. He is not overwhelmed at all by the daunting tasks that we see before us. He may even giggle that we are so distraught by it. But never the less, he sees it bothers us and is ready to jump in at our request.

As we go through this together I can already see He is working the past few weeks to my good. He is opening my eyes to some areas that need improvement that I can easily change and that could have a very positive impact on future bombardments. It's all good. Just in typing this I have calmed down a bit and am getting excited to go to Him in specific prayer with paper and pen in hand as we hash out a plan. If you think this sounds silly, perhaps you should sincerely try it. You will be amazed!

Lots of love to all!

D. J.

There is no Where to turn except God

I have a watched a couple of shows lately that have discussed epic events that they are predicting to happen in 2012 along with the updates that the fall of the US dollar will happen this year and basically life as we know it will dramatically change. So I find myself thinking about this often. What if it does happen, will we be ok, should we do something to prepare, will people finally turn back to God, will our faith be strong enough to see us through, what will my girls have to endure in their young adult lives. I have been worrying. I know I should not worry. But I find myself reminding myself that God is still in control and NOW is the time to fully rely on, turn to, and build our faith. We can't worry about the future but we can maximize - spiritually right now. That is what we have to do! That does prepare us for the future. I am also reminded that I should be more aware of what information I allow into my mind. While these shows are updates are very interesting at this point they cause me more harm that good. Movies that show the futuristic possibilities can also be a bit harmful. In the midst of all this I watched the movie Eli - which caused more fear and worry to rise up. II Timothy I believe tells us that fear is not from the Lord. Regardless of predictions - God is still God, still ultimately in control, He is and will continue to be my ultimate provider and protector. Whom shall I fear?

That's my thinking for this week!

Lots of love to all!

D. J.