Here's a thought - Faith and Pride

A week ago Sunday I was doing a 9 mile walk/jog in preparation for my first half marathon on May 1st. About 1/2 way through my knee began to hurt. Oddly enough, it hurt more when I walked. I was not sure I was going to be able to finish my training for the day. I kept pushing on. About 7 miles into it I decided to text my husband because I really did not know if I was going to make it. He encouraged me but was willing to come and get me if I needed him to. I completed my training. I immediately sat down and put ice on my knee. The next day, it was still pretty tender. I ran 2.5 miles Tuesday night, I can run pain free but walking really hurts. Wednesday - tender. Thursday I run another 2.5 no problem, except when I walk. Friday I think it's getting better. Run Saturday in a 5k race, new personal best time! Saturday night the knee starts popping when I walk, Sunday the pain is worse. Sunday at church I wanted to go forward and ask for prayer for healing, but I held back. I didn't ask because I thought my request was rather selfish. First of all, I didn't want to go to the doctor. I didn't want to tell the doctor that I am a runner and training for a half marathon because I am still a big girl - I didn't want to be embarrassed. I also did not want him to tell me I could not or should not do the half marathon. Second, I want my knee healed so I can do the half marathon. I know God can and will heal but didn't think my motives were right. So I began contemplating on this. God WANTS to heal me...He doesn't want me to be in pain...but does He care about my half marathon. Sunday it got a bit worse and by Monday morning it was popping with almost every walking step I took and when it popped it shot a pain through my knee. I called the doctor. I admitted I was a runner at my size and that I was training for a half marathon. Amazingly - it didn't knock him off his doctor stool! He just looked at my knee, asked me some more questions, and then prescribed some meds and a follow up visit before the race and said if we needed to we could put a shot into my knee to help at that time. WOW! Yesterday I started the medicine, put a knee support on for the day, I did not go run (because I didn't feel good) and my friend prayed for God to heal me knee and I agreed with her in this prayer. TODAY - minimal pops, minimal pain. You be the judge - one day of medicine and a knee support or GOD. I am leaning towards God. Something in my spirit said to me - D. J. not wanting to go to the doctor for those reasons are issues of pride, you faced those issues which opened the door for God to heal. I think it's pretty darn neat! Thank you God for healing my knee! Til next week. D. J.

Practice how you will Play

I played basketball when I was in high school. To this day I love basketball. My dad instilled in me a discipline that I practice today and that I have handed down to my children. As a freshman I moved to a new school and of course I wanted to play basketball! But none of the coaches at this new school had seen me play before and tryouts were a week long process. I was scared that I would not make the team since the coaches had never seen me play previous to try outs. My dad wisely instructed me to practice/tryout as if I were in the actual game - playing. "Practice how you plan to play" meaning go out there and practice as if your team depends on your performance for the win! Give it 110%! I can honestly say I had the most energy and hustle of any girl that tried out that week and YES I made the team - Jr. Varsity since I was a freshman but I got to sit on the bench as an extra/just in case for Varsity! Practice how you plan to play. Today as I train for a half marathon - I want to stop and rest while I am training, but I don't plan to stop and rest when I actually do the official half marathon so why would I practice that way! Today this principle is just as valid as it was over 20 years ago in my life. Last week I blogged about Norman Vincent Peale and I have been practicing more positive thoughts, living and imaging. On Sunday my husband came home with some pretty scary financial news. The kind that your mind instantly goes to worse case scenario type scary! I will admit at first I feared and was in a bit of a panic. But I had been practicing positive thoughts, living and imaging so now it was time to play! Remember all these thoughts, living and imaging are hand in hand with Gods word and require belief in God and His word - good old fashioned FAITH. Let me tell you I felt calmer very quickly and by Monday afternoon God was showing that he was in charge of our finances - and that we needed to FEAR NOT in a big way! As Christians every single day we have to live our faith - most days its pretty easy, but if we don't pay attention and purposefully live it on those easy days - come true game time we won't be prepared! Practice how you plan to Play! D. J.

Positive Positive Positive

This will just be a short one today. I am on my Norman Vincent Peale reading kick again! Man he was sure wise! I am rereading The Power of Positive Imaging and recently finished The Power of Positive Thinking and The Power of Positive Living. These 3 books really cover every area of our walk with Christ! How we think, how we live, and how we see ourselves as God sees us and as how God created us. I became aware of some thinkings that could be potentially harmful, I became aware of how my positive attitude has fallen back over the years since I first read these books. Everything he discusses is really biblical! I love this! I highly recommend you read anything he has written! These are the only 3 books of his that I own. I think I am going to either purchase more or head to the library to check out some!

That's my tidbit for today!

D. J.

What's up with chaos?

Have you ever noticed how we are just bombarded by chaotic unpredictable events and everything, even the mundane stuff, we had a grip on just grabs on to the proverbial rolling stone and goes down at an alarming rate! It is amazing when we can finish one simple task, like cooking dinner, or getting the bed made. Sometimes as it just begins to hit, we brace ourselves, knowing if we keep our cool and stand strong that we will weather the storm and it will soon be over. But then, another storm comes and we haven't quite recouped from the last one. Well, that's where I am at. It's not necessarily a bad place, but not a place I enjoy either. I get frustrated with myself for not being able to stay on top of things better in spite of the chaotic unpredictable madness. As I type this though, I wonder, is it really that I have been bombarded or am I always bombarded I just haven't been handling the normal bombardment well this go around. I don't know.

I think it started when I fell in the snow and hurt my wrist. I am getting good use back now and think I will even try doing dishes tonight. This happened 3 or 4 weeks ago. Then Brandy broke her finger about a week later ~ which led to frustrating interactions with doctors ~ which led to making calls to the Shriners. There is still a lot of activity in the broken finger storm going on. Add a case of strep throat for Brandy ~ diagnosed on Monday. Add a federal report at work that was due Friday ~ couldn't complete because I had put it off too long, had to leave early Friday to take Brandy to PT, and had to request information from another department for the report and it had not been returned yet. Planned on completing Monday but stayed home with Brandy due to the Strep. Tuesday had to play catch up before I could touch the report. Report is done today! So I think the brunt of the storm is over, but now it's time to clean up and to not let anything else get messy or behind. Have you ever had so much that needed to be done "Right Now" that it was just easier to do "Nothing". It's just too overwhelming to even try to figure out where to begin? Yep ~ that's where I am. I know I am a good planner/organizer/prioritizer. But at this point, I have no confidence in my abilities...well no confidence in all but one ability. My ability to pray.

To some it may seem silly to pray about getting caught up, about staying on top of what you do get done, about getting a plan of attack ready, and to pray for help just getting started. BUT, I am hear to tell you God is eager to jump in and help in any capacity we need him to. He is eager for that interaction with us. He is eager for us to reach out, for us to include Him. He is eager to pour out blessings of calm, of focus, of hope. He is not overwhelmed at all by the daunting tasks that we see before us. He may even giggle that we are so distraught by it. But never the less, he sees it bothers us and is ready to jump in at our request.

As we go through this together I can already see He is working the past few weeks to my good. He is opening my eyes to some areas that need improvement that I can easily change and that could have a very positive impact on future bombardments. It's all good. Just in typing this I have calmed down a bit and am getting excited to go to Him in specific prayer with paper and pen in hand as we hash out a plan. If you think this sounds silly, perhaps you should sincerely try it. You will be amazed!

Lots of love to all!

D. J.

There is no Where to turn except God

I have a watched a couple of shows lately that have discussed epic events that they are predicting to happen in 2012 along with the updates that the fall of the US dollar will happen this year and basically life as we know it will dramatically change. So I find myself thinking about this often. What if it does happen, will we be ok, should we do something to prepare, will people finally turn back to God, will our faith be strong enough to see us through, what will my girls have to endure in their young adult lives. I have been worrying. I know I should not worry. But I find myself reminding myself that God is still in control and NOW is the time to fully rely on, turn to, and build our faith. We can't worry about the future but we can maximize - spiritually right now. That is what we have to do! That does prepare us for the future. I am also reminded that I should be more aware of what information I allow into my mind. While these shows are updates are very interesting at this point they cause me more harm that good. Movies that show the futuristic possibilities can also be a bit harmful. In the midst of all this I watched the movie Eli - which caused more fear and worry to rise up. II Timothy I believe tells us that fear is not from the Lord. Regardless of predictions - God is still God, still ultimately in control, He is and will continue to be my ultimate provider and protector. Whom shall I fear?

That's my thinking for this week!

Lots of love to all!

D. J.

More Rambling

I don't have a specific thing to cover today, just some rambling thinking. Weather has been awesome with lots of snow but crazy at the same time. We went sledding a couple of times. I was nervous about Brandy getting hurt in the actual process of sledding. But we decided we were not going to keep her in a bubble. As safely as we could we took her. The funny thing is her most dangerous fall was due to me falling as I was holding her hand while we were walking from one sledding area to the other. Alli had reminded me that we needn't worry as we had covered Brandy in prayer and just think about all the fretting I did. In the grand scheme of things we can take precautions and not fret. If something is going to happen it will happen regardless of how much or how little we fret. Fretting is a waste of energy. When will I accept that and stop?

After that fall my wrist hurt - was real tender and I just thought I had bruised it. Yesterday I took a nasty fall - I don't recommend trying to tromp through fresh snow in moccasins - and hurt the wrist even more. Went to ER - xrays show all is ok BUT there is a bone they can't see. They say it is under the Snuff Bucket on the side of your wrist and that if it's broke, obviously, it will hurt. So they are treating this as a break. It hurts. Its an inconvenience. Its annoying. I am thinking there is a lesson in here somewhere but I have yet to find it. LOL.

I am reading another Norman Vincent Peale book - can't remember the title of this one...The Power of Positive something...It's all about moving from believing something to internalizing this belief. It's one thing to believe something, and a whole other thing to accept it, to internalize it. I am not there yet. That's frustrating as well.

Okay, those are my thoughts for today.

Until next time.

D. J.

Randomness I guess

Today I don't really have any one topic I don't think. Life, as always, is a little bit hectic. But in the midst of all of it I am focusing on little changes. Remember those 10 goals for the year? Each day I read over them and obviously there are things I do in the morning and there are things I do in the evenings as I strive to meet all 10 goals. It's kind of neat how much I hear God as I am working through these. Most of the goals require some sort of discipline and discipline is much easier to achieve when your heart is open to it and you know it's beneficial. God has been showing me scriptures and giving me great devotions that support that area and encourage me. Some of the goals require strength that I just don't have on a continual basis - but I can tap into God through prayer and He gives me strength! Some require patience - I am such an immediate gratification kinda girl - God is teaching me gently to look at the end result that is coming not on what is not happening like I would like it to at this particular point in time. He reminds me, small changes over time do yield visible undeniable results.

I have not been feeling good the past two days - I think the flu is trying to take me down. But, quite frankly, I don't want to be down. So each day I have prayed for God to help me through the day. I just realized I haven't prayed for healing though. Odd. Okay, I just did. God has been faithful to help me through the past two days and not miss work or miss class.

I am very aware of Gods busyness in my life right now. I see him at work. I see his blessings. I am hearing his promptings. More importantly I am WANTING to spend more time with Him as a result. So many of us want to spend more time with God because we know we are suppose to - but there is that hump that you cross after you realize it's more than a "have to". I am crossing that hump. I am excited to dive into a book I think He has brought me to. I am excited to read it and see what He has for me then to talk to Him about it. I am excited to pray in the mornings over my day. I don't ask him for his presence at work any more - I thank him and ask him to remind us that he is right here with us everyday wherever we are.

I feel an incoming peace - it hasn't consumed me, but I think it will. A peace of making changes that require me to lean on God. Changes that in the process with draw me closer to God. Changes that are making me more of what God intended me to be and changes that are making my life more like the life God intended me to live.

I can't remember exactly what was said in the sermon Sunday that prompted this thought. But I saw myself like on a tall sand dune in the middle of no where. I was crying because I could not find Jesus - but I knew He could be found. I knew that everyone else thought I was crazy and that I was alone in my quest. There was a voice - not audible - but a voice none the less that said - Will you still pursue me if nobody else does? My answer was Yes. That picture has not left my mind this week. That feeling of being alone but yet knowing the importance of my quest was important to more than just me - it was as if something greater depended on me to find Jesus. As I continue to ponder it, I am beginning to get more meaning out of it. But I will just let you think about it. What do you think?

That's it for this week!

Love ya!

D. J.